Blog

New Things

I love new things. (Well, most of them.) But my favorite new things are the ones that have been there all along, it just took me a while to see them.

In our bathroom we have a window that looks directly at the neighbors, so we have a curtain hung there all the time. Saturday night my sister and I heard fireworks, so we lifted the curtain to try see. We were too late, but I waited a few minutes by the window to see if there would be any more, and I noticed something amazing. Not only does the world look amazing at 10:30 at night, but you also have a perfect view of the moon from that window. Meaning the moonlight shines in.

When I was little I never experienced moonlight. I don’t know if I was because I never payed attention, or what, but it just wasn’t there. Now I know all the secret places in my house that it likes to come in. It lights up a room in a white, silvery glow. I’m in awe just thinking about it. It’s something so small, but to me, it’s magical.

Wood Smoke

Wood smoke is one of my favorite smells in the entire world. It’s just one smell, but it holds so many different memories.

When I was very young, around four, I think, my sister and I would go with my grandparents to reenactments of French fur trappers from the sixteen hundreds. Because I was so little I don’t remember them much, but there was always the smell of wood because it was at a camp ground. Now, when I smell the combination of wood smoke and a late summer evening, I will always be reminded of some of the happiest memories I have with my grandparents.

I’m so in awe of the fact that something so small can impact you so much. I have a memory for pretty much any combination of wood smoke.

  • Wood smoke and winter = my grandparents farm
  • Wood smoke and summer = cook-outs with one of my favorite neighbors
  • Wood smoke and fall = carving pumpkins with my cousin and sister

I know I go on and on about smells, but that’s because they’re so cool, and they feel so good. Every time I “smell a memory”, if you will, it makes me so happy.

We’re Gonna Try Something

As of now, I’m going to try to post on Mondays, Wednesday’s, and Saturdays. No promises on that, but it’s my goal. I’ve been having a lot of great post ideas lately but no push to really do anything about them. I’m hoping have a goal will give me the motivation I need.

Another new thing I’m going to add is… *pause for dramatic affect* Photograph Friday!!!! I have a ton of pictures I’ve been meaning to put up, but it’s insanely overwhelming. Starting next week I’m going start posting five or so pictures from my MANY albums. I hope you all enjoy them!!!

The Good Ol’ Days

When I was little my grandma would always give us baths before bed because we spent all day playing outside in the dirt. We would rotate between the four or five of us girls while a movie was on. I never really realized until today how amazing a memory that is. Last night I took a bath. It wasn’t super hot outside, but the world still felt like summer. I walked out of the steamy bathroom, took in the feel of the summer evening, and felt just like a little kid again. I’m not sure there’s anything more comforting than remember rocking in my grandma’s lap after an amazingly fun, magical day.

My House

I love my house. From every angle, upside and down, I will always love my house. I’ve never been to a place that lit up the way my house did. A place that was just as green in the summer, and completely glowed with life. I love how it looks in the winter, when the porch lights are on at night and you can see every snowflake in the air. I love how it looks on a late summer night, when the fireflies are dancing among the dandelions. And I love how it looks in the morning, when everything is fresh, and wet, and waking up.

I love how it changes through each season. It starts in spring, when everything smells so sweet. The colors of every flower pop out of every direction. The trees bud, starting the range of color throughout the year, and they slowly fall down onto the world. Making everything just as beautiful.

It then moves onto summer, where the nights only get more beautiful. Around seven o’clock the sun sets just right, shedding a golden light on everything, and amplifies the color all around. The fireflies come out to play and everyone walks out onto the porch to watch the sunset. The pink, orange, green, and purple sky.

On comes autumn. The world gets chillier yet still amazingly beautiful. Leaves start to fall, get caught in the breeze, and float along. Finding their own adventure. Through the whole season I hear the beginnings of new stories… New places to go and see…

Oh winter… Hated by many, loved by few. You turn my house into an amazing place. It’s always still on the outside, and cozy and warm on the inside. It’s safe. Like a big, warm hug. You make my entire house sparkle from ground to roof.

I could go on and on about the things from my house… My secret garden. My portal to Brazil. My evening terrace. The world you live in is only what you make of it. I choose to make mine as magical and beautiful as possible.

The Middle of the Storm

My entire life I’ve loved how beautiful the rain makes everything. How it smells. How it feels. It’s just amazing to me. But what I don’t understand is why people run from it? Sure, you’re gonna get a little wet, and maybe cold, but isn’t it worth it?

I feel like that’s one of the many secrets to finding the joy in life. Well, to keeping your sanity, anyway. God puts us through things for a reason, and we almost never know what that reason is until much later, if we ever know it at all. But, if we keep a look out for the good things, it gets easier to wait. Easier to hold on and trust that all of this crap we’re dealing with is for something good.

What I like to do when life just feels awful is stop and look for the little things that mean a lot. Like, smells that hold a memory. Or something from my environment that reminds me of the good days. Life doesn’t have to be perfect to help you feel happy. And, usually, the happy is right there, waiting for you to look for it.

Family

I love the family that you pick. The people you meet one day, befriend, and never want to let go of. I spent a majority of my life without many friends, but once my family switched churches I gained a huge, loud, loving family that I would never give up for a second. I’ve learned lately that each friend holds a different position, just like each family member does. With one friend I would run down the street in super hero capes at twelve o’ clock at night, and another I would snuggle up too and read with on a rainy day, and be just as happy. Without the diversity of my huge “family” I probably wouldn’t be where I am today doing what I do. I can certainly promise I wouldn’t be a poet and artist.

I’ve had friends come and go, and thinking back on it, it usually hurts. I miss the friends who’ve left. But, if they hadn’t left, I wouldn’t have the friends I do now. I hate the idea of growing up and having things change, but if things don’t change then my family won’t grow. I won’t have more random brothers and sisters and parents. I need those. I need people who will inspire me, and love me, and help me love, even if it’s only for a short time.

A couple years ago I wondered why someone would make friends if they know they’re going to leave someday? Why put your whole heart into something when you know it’ll be broken?

  1. Because being loved is worth it
  2. Because other people usually need you as much as you need them
  3. Because life without love isn’t as much of an adventure

It’s always interesting to me when someone tells me how much I mean to them. I’m an extrovert, so I whole-heartedly love pretty much everyone I meet, but for years I never realized what that meant to people. Other people need to feel loved just as much as I do, and I help spread that. If I had quit way back in the beginning because I knew there would be heart break I would’ve missed out on all the joy. All the late nights with my best friend, all the extra “mom hugs”, and the realization that I bring joy to peoples lives. I think one of the greatest gifts I’ve been given is the ability to make someone feel loved.

Music Inspired Haiku: #5

I heard a loud voice:
“Let the dancing commence!”
People rushed out.

I got swept along.
Not ready for all of this…
But, I had no choice.

There’s so much going on.
I’m far too overwhelmed.
I need to escape.

“Let me out of it,”
I said. But no one heard me.
Just let it all end…

Music Inspired Haiku: #4

So much is at stake.
With one fight comes another.
It's inescapable.

Seems never ending.
Something lurking all around...
Oh, so much madness.

But with all shadows,
there's bound to be a light.
Somewhere, anyway...

Light's not what you think.
Seems safe, but not always.
Things hide in plain view.

Easy to get lost,
when plain view seems so right.
Just as much a trap.

Daggers hang around,
aiming for the soul inside.
Escape? None in sight.

Can this all be real?
I'm not ready to fight yet...
Please... all be a dream...

Music Inspired Haiku: #3

As I walk through life,
I remember what I've seen.
The places I've been.

Rome, Paris, Madrid...
Each holds a place in my heart.
I miss them all so...

I can't escape them.
I see them everywhere.
Transported each time.